FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Sold Out Crowd Flocks to NED 2005 in Mantego Bay
February 22, 2005 (Mantego Bay, Jamaica) -- This week, high-paying technologists, geek celebs, and venture capitalists will get to mingle with the inventors of the paper clip, the electron-micron mousetrap, and the anti-spam pasta maker as well as with the artist and former piccolo player for the UnGrateful in Bed String Quartet at the world's highest-priced and most exclusive techno-mindfest, NED (Nonsense, Entropy, and Desuetude). The event has been so oversubscribed that stun-gun operators will ring the entrance to repel dotcom crashers who didn’t buy their tickets one year in advance and are still willing to pay full price to sit in an overflow water tank with sharks, where they can watch Simulcast presentations of aging musicians and gene splicers from the main hall.
For the first time this millennium, $100,000 prizes will be awarded to three NEDDies who have contributed the most to hyping this event in the past 17 years, since its inception by a former guidebook author and event promoter. It’s been rumored that the Nonsense award will go to Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer for arguing that the open source movement is Communist; the Entropy award will go to the FTC for making spam worse; and the Desuetude award might be given to Intel for developing a chip costing millions of dollars that got chucked before it was introduced.
For a complete roster of speakers and attendees, see www.misfortune500.com.
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